God is the Light…

I know most of you must have heard this nasheed and might know the lyrics. (In case somebody doesn’t here’s a link for it u can find many different nasheeds here).

Anyway, I was just listening to the nasheed and thought of puttin up the lyrics since I love the poetry. So here’s to uncle Yusuf Islam!

God is the Light
How great the wonder of the heavens
And the timeless beauty of the night
How Great, then how Great, the Creator?

And its stars like priceless jewels
Far beyond the reach of kings
Bow down for the shepherd guiding him home

Yet how many hearts are closed?
To the wonder of this night
Like pearls hidden deep
Beneath a dark stream of desires

But like dreams vanish with the call to prayer
And the dawn extinguishes night
Here too, are signs
God is the Light!
God is the Light!

How great the beauty of the Earth
And the creatures who dwell on her
How Great, then how Great, the Creator?

As its mountains pierce the clouds
High above the lives of men
Weeping rivers for thousands of years

Yet how many eyes are closed?
To the wonder of this sight
Like birds in a cage
Asleep with closed wings

But like words stop with the call to prayer
And the birds recite
Here too, are signs
God is the Light!
God is the Light!

How great the works of man
And the things he makes
How Great, then how Great, the Creator?

And though he strives to reach the heavens
He can barely survive
The wars of the world he lives in

Yet how many times he’s tried?
Himself to immortalize
Like his parents before him
In the Garden of Eden

But like the sun sets with the call to prayer
And surrenders to the night
Here too, are signs
God is the Light Everlasting!
God is the Light Everlasting!
God is the Light Everlasting!
God is the Light Everlasting!

Intentions…

Question:
I forget to form the intention when doing most deeds. What should I do?.

Answer:
Praise be to Allaah.

Intention (niyyah) is an important matter, as it is the spirit of deeds through which deeds become valid, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Actions are but by intentions and each person will have but that which he intended.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (1) and Muslim (1907).

The intention turns permissible deeds into acts or worship, hence we should pay attention to it and make it for the sake of Allaah, free from any element of showing off.

It should be noted that intentions are of two types:

1 – Obligatory intention, without which an act of worship is not valid, such as the intention in doing wudoo’, praying, paying zakaah, fasting and doing Hajj. This intention is something that no one can do without. If a person does wudoo’ to pray, touch the Mus-haf or in order to be pure (taahir), he has formed the intention. Intending to pray or intending to remove impurity is forming the intention when doing wudoo’.

When a man stands to pray, knowing that this is Zuhr prayer, for example, and he intends to offer the prayer and gets up to do it it, then he has formed the intention. It is not essential – and in fact it is not prescribed – to say out loud, “I intend to pray Zuhr prayer” etc, as some people do. This was not narrated from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), and the place for the intention is in the heart.

Similarly, if a person decides at night that he will fast on the following day, then he has formed the intention of fasting. In fact, his eating sahoor shows that he is intending to fast.

It is difficult for a person to forget to form the intention in such cases.

2 – The second type of intention is that which is mustahabb in order to attain reward. This is what some people forget, which is to keep the intention in mind when doing permissible things, so that they will be acts of worship, such as eating, drinking and sleeping with the intention of strengthening oneself to do acts of worship, as the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “You will never spend anything that you spend for the sake of Allaah, but you will be rewarded for it, even the morsel of food that you put in your wife’s mouth.” Narrated by al-Bukhaari (56).

Mu’aadh (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: I sleep and I get up (to pray at night), and I seek reward for my sleep as I seek reward for my getting up. Narrated by al-Bukhaari (4088).

He (may Allaah be pleased with him) sought reward for his sleep just as he sought reward for his getting up to pray at night, because he intended by sleeping to gain strength to do acts of worship.

Al-Haafiz Ibn Hajar said in al-Fath: What this means is that he sought reward by resting just as he sought reward by striving, because if the intention in resting is to enable one to do acts of worship, one attains reward. End quote.

What helps to keep this intention in mind is deliberating, thinking and not being hasty. So you should think about what you are intending to do, take stock of yourself before acting, think about whether it is halaal or haraam, then look at your intention: what do you want from this? Every time you take stock of yourself and think before acting, this will remind you about forming the intention, until it becomes second nature and a habit that you adopt, so that you will not enter or exit, eat or drink, give or withhold, without having an intention in doing so, thus most of your time will become times of worship.

We ask Allaah to help us and you to do that.

And Allaah knows best.

 

Happiness abounds…heh..

Allah has full knowledge of your enemies. Sufficient is He as your Protector, and sufficient is He to comfort you.-Qur’an, An-Nisa, Surah 4:45

Wow! Isn’t this just simply AWESOME! I mean, I read this line and I just sat there, gazing blankly at the computer screen, just thinking how wonderful this verse is, masha’Allah!

Like basically Allah is saying, you just relax, take a chill pill, follow My Path and DO NOT worry AT ALL about ANY of your enemies, be it the stupid Shaytan, the people who hate you and wish to harm you, or maybe just your own Nafs which wishes to beguile you to the “Coool path” and lead you astray.

Just Relax! eh?

Makes me feel really good!

lol…

And you know what’s the SUPER BEST of it all? That Allah says that not only will He protect us, but also COMFORT us!! What can be more beautiful than that? Subhan Allah!

I’m so happy! hehe…

Ayah…

No disaster, unless it has been preordained and recorded in the book of records, can ever befall the earth nor your own selves. Behold, all this is easy enough for Allah. Know this so that you may not despair for the good fortune you lost, nor exult unduly because of the blessings bestowed upon you. Allah does not love the arrogant and the boastful.

-Qur’an, Al-Hadid, 57:22-23

A convo…

Lol…I’ve been sitting on the computer for six seven hours straight! Probably that’s why I’ve gone crazy posting, posting and posting on my blog. This is a conversation that I just had with a friend of mine. I copied it to send to a cousin of mine, and then I thought, “What the heck? Lets just post it on the blog!” So…here it is. My poor friend was very conscious of her nick but I told her it would serve as comic relief! Lol.

My mouth is on fire says:you know i had this revert friend

My mouth is on fire says:

lucy

My mouth is on fire says:

she reverted like in 2003

My mouth is on fire says:

and hid her islam from her parents

~*ST*~ says:

OK

My mouth is on fire says:amd she used to be really afraid to tell them abt itMy mouth is on fire says:

and she used to tell me that

My mouth is on fire says:

the hardest was praying

My mouth is on fire says:

because she had to lock the door

~*ST*~ says:

obviously

My mouth is on fire says:

and during ramadhan she used to stay outside

My mouth is on fire says:

so that her parents dont force her to eat

My mouth is on fire says:and she started wearin hijab

My mouth is on fire says:

telling her mum its jst for fun

~*ST*~ says:

wat age?

My mouth is on fire says:

her mum ripped it off and refused to take her

My mouth is on fire says:

to the uni

My mouth is on fire says:

19

My mouth is on fire says:

my age

My mouth is on fire says:that was 2 years

~*ST*~ says:

poor girlie

My mouth is on fire says:

so she used to get up at 6

My mouth is on fire says:

in winters

My mouth is on fire says:

and walk all the way to the bus station

My mouth is on fire says:

then finally when she told her parents

My mouth is on fire says:

they chucked her out of the houseMy mouth is on fire says:so she wasn’t online for a couple of weeks

My mouth is on fire says:

and now finally, she’s married and moving to Saudia arabia ~*ST*~ says:btw how did she revertMy mouth is on fire says:she didnt like christanity

My mouth is on fire says:

so she started to think abt other religions

My mouth is on fire says:

just in her mind

My mouth is on fire says:

then she had algerian neighbours

My mouth is on fire says:

so she just took a copy of quran or something

My mouth is on fire says:

thats itMy mouth is on fire says:it didnt take long and allMy mouth is on fire says:I’m still wearing hijaab, it got a lot worse with my parents after I last blogged, with my mother hitting me but I’m really happy to still be wearing it.

THIS IS FROM HER BLOG~*ST*~ says:saddMy mouth is on fire says:yeh but she’s all happy now

~*ST*~ says:

im so happy for her!

My mouth is on fire says:

yeh me too

~*ST*~ says:

Al-Hamdulillah

~*ST*~ says:

but that just sucks man! all da born muslims r such farigh ppl…v dont even realize wat a blessin it is to b able to practice our religion araam say, so easily…My mouth is on fire says:exactly!!!

My mouth is on fire says:

we cant even be bothered to pray

My mouth is on fire says:

this makes me so depressed

~*ST*~ says:

i no man

~*ST*~ says:

it makes me pissed sometimes~*ST*~ says:at my family, myself, my friends. They CAN practice their religion easily, but do they?!

Ugh…

Mum, I’ve Decided I Want to Follow Allah.

This is a very old newspaper article. Its by Kay Jardine, The Herald, March 8 2002, CE. I found it on the site www.thetruereligion.org.

Even though its very old, I’m still posting it up here. The comments by the reverts are just simply amazing!

I feel so sad! I knew reverts had a better understanding of the Deen than most of born Muslims. I wish I could make the entire LGS and BNU read this. *sniff*

Western women are turning to Islam in rapidly increasing numbers. KAY JARDINE discovers why they are so keen to become Muslims.

 Bullying, depression, and insomnia made Kimberley McCrindle’s teenage years particularly difficult. Taunts from classmates about her weight and how she looked left the 19-year-old student feeling like she didn’t really fit in, and always searching for something that would make her feel happy, that would make her feel she belonged. McCrindle, from a family of atheists, did not encounter religion until she began religious studies at high school in Penicuik, when her new interest prompted her to start going to her local church on Sundays. But the peace and happiness McCrindle was looking for eluded her until she started college in Edinburgh, where she made friends with some Muslim people and discovered Islam.

“I was looking for peace,” she says. “I’d had a rough past. My teenage years weren’t great: I was bullied at school, people called me fat and ugly, and I was looking for something to make me happy. I tried to go to church once a week but I wouldn’t class myself a Christian; I was just interested. But it wasn’t for me, I didn’t feel in place there.

“When you walk into a mosque you feel really peaceful. Praying five times a day is really focused. It gives you a purpose in your life. The Koran is like a guide to help you: when you read it, it makes you feel better.”

McCrindle became a Muslim three years ago and is now known by her married Arabic name, Tasnim Salih. She is one of a rapidly increasing number of British women turning to Islam, thought to be the fastest growing religion in the world. Although there are no official figures on the subject, there is no doubt that the number of converts is on the rise and the majority are women, according to Nicole Bourque, a senior lecturer in social anthropology at Glasgow University and an expert in conversion to Islam in Britain.

“There are people converting all the time,” she says. “I would estimate that there are probably around 200 converts to Islam in Glasgow alone, but that’s just a rough estimate. The data is difficult to acquire.”

Other estimates put the Glasgow figure closer to 500. Mohammad Faroghul-Quadri, imam at the Khazra mosque in
Glasgow, says that whichever religion people choose to reach God, whether it’s Christianity or Islam or something else, the important thing is that they are getting peace of mind and heart, and proper guidance from God.^[1]

The appeal of Islam to liberated western women is difficult for many to understand, largely because of the widespread perception in the west that it treats women badly. A forthcoming documentary, Mum I’m a Muslim, addresses this very issue by talking to converts in Sheffield about their experiences.

At a preview in Glasgow, I asked a group of converts from Glasgow and Edinburgh what motivated them to change every aspect of their lives, including their names, to become Muslim. For 27-year-old Bahiya Malik, or Lucy Norris to her parents, it’s difficult to explain. Bahiya, who lives in Edinburgh, her twin sister, Victoria, and their brother, Matthew, grew up as practising Christians in a rural area in the West Midlands, where they attended Sunday school in the little church at the top of their road. As they got older, the three stopped going to church and seven years ago, at the age of 20, both Bahiya and her sister converted to Islam – six months after their brother.

“Maybe all through our teenage years we hadn’t been that happy. I can’t really say what it was. I don’t know if we felt there was something missing or that we didn’t fit in. We were a little bit shy and we weren’t really outgoing sort of people,” she says.

At the time, Bahiya was two years into a media and television course in Edinburgh but was feeling uninspired. After around six months of learning about Islam, Bahiya realised that living her life according to the rules of Islam was what would make her happy and, during an emotional visit to a mosque in
London, made her declaration of faith.

 “I think it’s something you feel in your heart, this pull,” she says. “You can’t really put it into words. It’s like your heart speaking, something you feel inside and you know it’s for you. Allah has chosen this for you, it’s out of your power.”

Women who turn to Islam are aware of the widespread western perception that they are oppressed and discriminated against, but insist that the depiction is a false image. For many it is a spiritual journey, which, far from repressing them, improves their social status and gives them new rights.

“You seem to be really looked after,” says Tasnim. “As a Muslim woman, Muslim men really respect you; they do everything for you. You’re highly thought of and protected.” Bahiya says: “I feel that because you cover yourself up you’re not seen as a sex symbol, and because people can’t judge you on your appearance, they have to judge you as a human being. That’s quite liberating.”

As an act of modesty, many Muslim women don’t wear make up outside the home and it is often a part of their old life that new female converts are happy to discard because of the liberating feeling that comes from knowing their appearance doesn’t matter. They resist being shown as they were before their conversion.

 Hafsa Hashmi, who lives in Glasgow, converted to Islam 24 years ago and felt life outside Islam was like having to “keep up with the Joneses”. Under Islam, however, she says: “Your aim is not for this life, your aim is for the afterlife. To some people that sounds pretty horrific: they can’t think about death, but in Islam belief in the afterlife is one of its main features, because you know if you’re doing the right thing you’ve got a better life to come. So why go for all the material things?”

Converting to Islam usually means a complete change of lifestyle for those who take the plunge, including a different diet, often a new Arabic name, and your time revolving around the five daily Islamic prayers. In the workplace, some people organise with their employer a room where they can have some peace and quiet to pray. Wherever they are in the world, all Muslims face in the direction of the Kab’aa, or the Holy House in
Mecca, Saudi Arabia, during prayer.

For female converts, the experience can also involve a quite dramatic change in appearance. Muslim law provides that women must dress modestly. The hijab, or the head scarf, is a particular focal point and can be a tricky area for new Muslim women to deal with. Dr Bourque suggests this is because it is such a visible symbol of the faith. Tasnim wore the hijab straight away, although she found wearing it in public scary at first because she felt people were looking at her. She was then forced to take it off when she was out because of some of the comments directed at her. “People would shout, ‘Go back home to your own country’. I had someone spit at me once when I was standing at the bus stop at college.”

Now, though, she wears it all the time and says: “People don’t say anything to me now and I feel more confident about wearing it.” Bahiya was happy wearing the hijab from the beginning, but her parents found it quite difficult. She says her sister, her brother, and herself were lucky because their parents were “quite good” about their conversion.

For others, however, families are not always so accepting, often because they know little about the religion and why their loved ones want to follow it. For Tasnim, telling her parents, who are atheist, was nerve-wracking. “They thought I was going through a phase at first but they realised when I started wearing the hijab that I was serious. They started getting angry when I began to talk about getting married. They weren’t too pleased that I’d met someone older than me, who was Muslim as well, and a different nationality.” While Tasnim and her mother are still close and enjoy a good relationship, they tend not to talk about her faith much. She and her father no longer speak.

For Hafsa, telling her parents 24 years ago was perhaps even more difficult because converting to Islam then was anything but a common occurrence. The reactions of her parents were totally opposite. “I think my mother felt that I was only becoming a Muslim because of who I was marrying, but that wasn’t the case because I had been introduced to Islam about four years previously although I didn’t convert until I got married. It took her practically her whole life to get over it. When we got married, my mum said, ‘If you’re happy, I’m happy’, but obviously she wasn’t. My dad said it and he meant it, that was the difference between them.”

Tasnim has been married to Sabir, who is Sudanese, for two years, and says she has never been happier. “I met my husband at college and it seemed like the right thing to do. I was teaching him English and he was talking to me about Islam, and we just fell in love,” she says. Bahiya’s husband, Sharafuddin, is also is also a convert, formerly known as Cameron. They have two children, aged two and four.

For Tasnim, Bahiya, and Hafsa, life revolves around the five daily prayers, they cannot eat certain foods, or drink alcohol. But the women say they miss nothing from the days before they converted to Islam. “Islam is enough for me,” says Bahiya. “You don’t need anything else once you’ve found it.” Becoming Muslim has provided Tasnim with the happiness and belonging she was looking for. “It’s a complete change in your attitude, behaviour, and the way you think,” she says. “I’m now more confident, happy and satisfied. I’ve achieved the fulfilment I was looking for.”

Source: http://www.theherald.co.uk/perspective/archive/8-3-19102-21-6-52.html

Notes

[1] This is a a false statement. The only religion acceptable to Allah – the one which leads to true guidance and peace, is Islam: “Whoever seeks a religion other than Islam, it will never be accepted from him and in the Hereafter he will be one of the losers” [Qur'an 3:85]

Actually from Yusuf Islam…

LOL! To tell you the truth, I started off the previous post with the intention of discussing my interest in Yusuf Islam. Lol. But it somehow went on to my interest in music and hence the entire post.

BASICALLY, what I wanted to tell, when I mentioned nasheeds was that Yusuf Islam and the story of his reversion and his nasheeds all really inspire me. But right before I left for Hajj, I found out that he had released a new album and has again fully associated himself with his previous identity as a singer and songwriter. I was very upset and actually prayed for him during Hajj. On the day of Arafat. Imagine. lol.

Now that I’m back, I have started researching on him. Especially on his explanation of why he has returned to music.

I’m a bit confused. His explanation makes sense. A lot of sense, sometimes. And it also coincides with the belief of my ideal, my brother.

I have to admit I’m terribly flustered. Lol.

Anyway, my research is still on and InshAllah I will satisfy myself with the best explanation soon.

Meanwhile, you people read this thing which I really liked on a site of Yusuf Islam.

Spiritual Journey: One Beginning. 

Everybody who comes into the world has to make sense of it for their own security and peace of mind. The Universe is a very big place, and it’s easy to get lost. I was no different. The Universe consists of billions of galaxies and each galaxy has an uncountable number of stars. This alone should be enough for us to ponder. Yet in addition to the vast expanding heavens, we observe the radiance of the earth and its kaleidoscope of creatures, colors and ecological patterns, in harmony with the motions of the sun and moon.

As we look more deeply at the scale of things above and below us – seas, mountains and the grandeur of the heavenly skies – we are forced to question our own existence. Because we have minds and the ability to question, certainly everybody has sufficient reason to ask themselves what it all means?
In recent decades physicists, in their pursuit of scientific truths, have unearthed a hidden order in nature; some have called it the Cosmic Code. Based on this order, scientists aim to uncover a grand unifying Theory of Everything. If ever this order is decoded, it is envisioned by some that all fields of knowledge could be linked together. In view of this astounding possibility, world renowned physicists have commented:“If we do discover a complete theory, it should in time be understandable in broad principle by everyone, not just a few scientists. Then we shall all, philosophers, scientists and just ordinary people, be able to take part in the discussion of why it is that we and the universe exist. If we find the answer to that, it would be the ultimate triumph of human reason- for then we would truly know the mind of God.” (Stephen W. Hawking, A Brief History of Time, 1988)

Many scientist have concluded that, according to the laws of nature and the unimaginable number of coincidences which must have united together connecting an infinite amount of molecules and unique elements to generate and form what we call ‘life’, everything seems to point one way. Their conclusion proves one thing: how impossible the existence of this immeasurable universe would be without certain constants. It is precisely because of the vital existence of these ‘constants’ or universal laws that everything in the cosmos balances and holds together.To summarize this in simple terms, without an overall singular design – supported by universal constants, there would be nothing to see, no one to see it – let alone sit around and talk about it.

The centrality of this original source is observed by the uniformity in the workings of these forces of nature all through the universe; the common origin of everything in the universe and the blueprint of life all across the species. Combine this with the generally accepted theory of the Big Bang, that mysterious moment in non-time when the universe started to exist, and we end up talking about singularity – or oneness. It now becomes necessary to analyse the implication of this information.

Do not the deniers see that the heavens and the earth were [once] one single unity, which We then ripped apart? And that We made out of water every living thing? {The Holy Qur’an, Al-Anbia (The Prophets) 21:30}

What such realities signify to people of faith is acceptance, in scientific terms, of the presence of Intelligent Design: in other words – GOD (Allah).

Although some rational minds may choose to reject the implications of a Divine Design, the evidence of life starting from a point of unity (oneness) is undeniable. Yet an alternative answer to life’s puzzle has never been agreed between them. Therefore it is left up to a person’s conscience to choose what he prefers to believe.

The conscience itself is probably the most vital characteristic of being human. We often refer to this aspect as ‘morality’ or ‘spirituality’. And it is the amazing spiritual nature of humanity, which makes us unique – and also makes us accountable. It is the inner discussion with the self, which distinguishes the human being from the animals.

Regardless of where a person’s conscience asks him or her to look – if guided – a seeker of truth will inevitably find a mysterious door leading to God. Even the greatest scientists repeatedly confirmed their ultimate wish to know the ‘Mind of God’. Their journey towards unravelling the mysteries of the universe is usually sparked by a common desire: to know what lies behind the unseen and makes it work. As the renowned scientist and father of the atomic age is reported to have said, “I want to know God’s thoughts; the rest are details.” (Albert Einstein)

If a person reaches the gate of knowledge to the unseen, he or she will discover the ultimate purpose of existence, and thus fulfil the need to worship by knowing Him and obeying the Divine Inspiration sent by Him. This is basically the meaning of Islam: surrender to the One sole Originator and Sustainer of the Universe (Allah).

From Yusuf Islam to me…

I have always been very interested in hearing the stories of reverts of Islam. Partly, it’s to know how Allah gave hidayat to different people in different ways, and partly it’s to shake my own conscience. Normally, I think, reverts are so much better than us born Muslims, in terms of knowledge and practice of the Deen. (It may not be true, but that’s what I think.)

From quite some time, I have been trying to give up music for good. Al-Hamdulillah, I have, to a certain extent. As in, I, myself, have stopped listening to music but that’s a different thing that music is playing in my house 24/7.

I was once a music freak. I used to love listening to music, I used to sing myself, I actually used to once wish that I’d start singing professionally one day. (Lol!) Because I used to sing myself, I knew a bit of the technicalities of desi music. The sur and the taal, the beat and the pitches and God knows what else. I used to love music. Correction: I still love music. (No point in lying!)

The funny part is, I didn’t find it difficult at all to leave music. I mean, I think Allah had prepared me so well for it (or I have taken so much time in finally taking the decision!), that when the time came when I just stood my ground and told myself, “That’s it! No more music!” it wasn’t difficult for me at all, Al-Hamdulillah.

But Allah always opens new doors to relief and ease for me, Al-Hamdulillah. During the days when  I was trying to leave music, a little cousin of mine came to my rescue. (Incidently, she’s the one who introduced me to that Ahmed Bukhatir’s Last Breath.)

She gifted me with this cassette, “Bismillah,” a collection of nasheeds by ‘Yusuf Islam & Friends.’ That sparked my interest in this non-musical genre of music.

During the Hajj trip, there would be times when I would fall prey to stupid Satan’s temptations and would wanna hum something sweet and melodious.*rolling eyes* Those would be the times when I would turn to my cell phone and listen to Zain Bhikha’s “Give Thanks to Allah,” which my blessed Sister-in-law had transferred on my newly-gifted cell phone seconds before leaving Lahore.

I guess it was basically during the Hajj trip that I got addicted to nasheeds. Even though I only had a few(“Give Thanks to Allah” and a few Qari Waheed Zafar Qazmi’s), I would never get bored of them.

Ever since I have come back, there’s only one thing I do the entire day: listen to nasheeds. It’s fun and it’s relaxing. Best of all, it’s safe.

But sometimes when I listen to nasheeds, I realize they have pretty much the same effect other songs had on me. Umm…lets not say, the same effect, but at least a similar one.

Mostly, nasheeds inspire me and bring a smile on my face for no reason. My SIL has noticed that and thinks I’m crazy. Lol. But it’s true. I guess I find most of them so soothing, a smile automatically plays on my face.

But there are certain times when I would suddenly get all excited and hyper after listening to a nasheed. Pretty much the same way as I used to when I used to listen to some great song. Other times I would sit and wonder how beautiful the voice of the singer is. Lol. And then, finally there’s this single nasheed which really creates a storm inside me. I have no idea why. Like I would listen to it and something would be rising inside me. An upheaval. It upsets me too, and it sets me to thinking about things I, maybe, do not want to think.

I think it’s because of its tune.

But that’s how it used to be with songs as well. (???)

Sometimes I wonder where the difference lies.

But then I can see a great many differences, too. Nasheeds are all about remembering and glorifying Allah(Swt) and/or singing the praises and sending durood to Prophet Mohammad (Peace be upon him.) I guess that’s why I find them soothing and that’s why they bring a smile on my face.

So if nothing else, at least I’m not listening to Atif Aslam FOREVER wailing about his long-lost love’s eyelashes which he wants to connect to his eyelashes (?!!) or to some wahiyat dance song or to some  unbelievably, horribly depressing song which would seek out some, something in my entire being to get depressed about. Ugh!

In my moments of stupid pride, I think maybe I find nasheeds a bit difficult (because of how they, too, affect my emotions and moods) because I used to know about, and was conscious of the beats and the tones and the sur which I knew affected the moods and played with the feelings. Or so I think.

Why?

I have no idea why I opened this window and started writing. I mean, there are plenty of things which I know I can write about, which can prove to be very amusing, interesting and thought-provoking for you. But right now, I’m not in the mood to discuss any of those things. Maybe later.

Umm…I’m not sure what I should write right now. I’m not really in an inspired mood right now so don’t wanna write about religion really. But I guess I should. I have been witnessing so many weird things and meeting so many weird people, it’s really remarkable.

There’s this guy at my university. Excellent writer, MashAllah. I’m seriously a huge fan of his writing. I mean, coming from a guy studying at BNU, wouldn’t you fall for this line, “I paid for the drink, and I paid for drinking it.” I know it doesn’t sound like much here but I really like his writing.

But then, there he goes around writing this story about him screwing Satan. Literally.

Then, when I go ask him why in the world he submitted such a story for our final AOS exam, he starts telling me a bit about himself. “I was once very much into Satanism.”

Apparently, he used to listen to death metal (am i right in saying that’s the one which has elements of satan worship in it?), was deeply interested in cults and God-knows-what-else. Al-Hamdulillah, something happened and he came to his senses.

And here I am, thinking about that guy ever since I have talked to him. I mean, why is it that so much of the youth today is so disillusioned, disheartened by Allah (Naoozobillah!) and attracted towards atheism or worse, “Satanism?”

I mean, is it because people are so impatient that once they ask something from Allah and He doesn’t grant it, they lose all faith and trust in Him? Or is it because, Al-Hamdulillah, I have seen a relatively simple life so I don’t know what circumstances lead to a person rejecting/doubting the religion he was born in?

Obviously, I’m not judging him here, nor will I ever do it, InshAllah. I’m really, really happy that he is back on the straight path, MashAllah, and I pray he remains so forever InshAllah.

Ironically, he was the only guy of my university who actually came up and said he wanted to write duas in my diary which I’m taking with me for Hajj inshAllah. And MashAllah, his duas are one of the best, sweetest and most religion-based duas of all duas that came from BNU-ite friends.

But I just can’t stop wondering what had happened to actually make him do all that?

I mean, when I was talking to him, I was thinking, go on, keep talking, tell me about your life so that I can know how and why you moved away from Deen and into something so different. Keep talking.

But I neither got a chance to talk to him for long, nor, I’m sure, he would have told me as it was the first time we were ever talking.

All this breaks my heart. It’s just sad.

I mean, it’s not only H I’m talking about here, my friend Z, was just telling me about some friend of hers who wishes for death constantly. He wonders why suicide is haram. Why Allah never listens to his prayers.

I mean, what is this all about? Why does this happen? Is it because Allah put them in some test and they failed and now He is punishing them; or maybe because they are cowards; or maybe just because they may actually be right when they say Allah has abandoned them?

Like I’ve already said, I’m in a weird mood right now, certainly not the one in which I should write about religion. But then I thought, it’s not like I’m afraid of being doubtful about my religion ever, InshAllah, so I should write about it in any mood. I guess.

May Allah forgive me if I have said something I shouldn’t have. But seriously, all this breaks my heart. So many people; young people my age, apparently happy ‘cool’ people, good-looking people, sweet people, even my friends; so many people around me are so unhappy with their life, with their religion, with their Allah. I mean, why? I think, I’m one of you. I’m just like you. We have all loved and lost. We have all had our ups and downs. We have all prayed to Allah and sometimes have not gotten what we prayed for. But then why is it that Al-Hamdulillah, I’m happy and you’re not? I’m contented, you’re regretful? I look back at my past, and despite some major mistakes, I can still manage to smile…a huge smile, MashAllah. And you…you don’t even wanna turn back and look.

Basically, I guess I’m trying to say here that sometimes I feel guilty. Guilty of my happiness, contentment, guilty why Allah loves me so much, guilty why Allah has blessed me with the greatest blessing of all: loving Him and placing my trust on Him completely and thus being happy with what He provides.

I guess I just feel guilty why I’m  happy and they are not.

Basically, my question is just this:

Why?

Sung-dil!

Well…I’m free right now so might as well update…I had this idea for the post for a long time but just didn’t wanna sit down and write. Enough of writing on my hands these days! *grrrrrr*

Some time back, this cousin of mine, A, discovered this video titled “Qabr ka Azaab.” It was about this ‘modern’ guy who is Sin incarnate. As in, he is the reflection of most of the people around us these days.

He is rude to his father, mean to most people, wastes time with his friends playing cards and such, doesn’t offer his Salahs, turns up the volume of music, or at least ignores it, when the Adhaan is being called out.

Well, the guy dies. The movie shows Malakul Maut coming to take him. And then the entire process that takes place from death till he reaches his grave…how angels in all black come to receive him and remind him of all he has done in life, how the spirit is watching his family and friends crying over his dead body, he apolgizes to his father but obviously he can’t hear him; he is basically repenting and wishing for more time so that he could go back and work on his Naam-ae-Aamaal (however u spell it.) Well, then they show his Aamaal as a dog sitting on top of his dead body as they are taking him to the graveyard. Finally, the angels reveal to him a Grave which is an illustration of the raging fires of Hell.

As it turns out, all this is a dream and he IS getting a chance to mend his ways. He does, too. Tauba tun Nasoo…

Well, I liked the movie. I was a bit sceptical about men posing as angels though, and about the fact that the Aamaal are seen as dogs by the spirits, but I thought that the basic message was good so all’s good.

Turns out A has sleepless nights because of it. Her mother started crying after she saw it. A distributed it far and wide. People were very scared of it. Many claim to actually imagine those black angels calling out their names every time they try committing sins.

It was a bit thought-provoking for me. That’s it.

Whenever I heard A telling me the reactions of the people, I would get worried. As in, I would think, What the hell is wrong with me? Why doesn’t it move me to tears? Is Allah unhappy with me? That is why, I’m becoming stone-hearted and such things do not make me fear. Allah rehem!!

Well, soon after that, I met another cousin of mine. A younger cousin. A sweet little kid. Very religious and God-fearing, MashAllah. Well, she came upto me, all excited, “Sana Apa, you have got to see this thing. This video! It’s amazing!”

She took me to see that video on her computer. It was that nasheed from Ahmed Bukhatir called ‘Last Breath’ based on some footballer who died during a match. Just like that. One moment, he is coming in with a smile on his face, second, poof! He falls down on the ground and dies within seconds.

Its a simple nasheed, with simple lyrics.

But that nasheed started haunting me. Not in a bad nagging way. But in a good way. I would keep humming the tune, singing the few words I knew then. It kept haunting me.

Today, I finally made the effort of searching online and finding the video.

Today when I was, as usual, delaying my Isha prayer, I suddenly found myself humming some words of that nasheed…”Come on, my brothers, let us pray. Decide which now, do not delay.”

Needless to say, it left me shaken.

Gracious and kind as I am, I’m providing you with a link here so that you can go check the video out yourself. If it affects you, too, and you do something nice, it will, InshAllah, be sadqa jaria for me! Ah-haaa!!

http://islamic-download.com/pc/video/inspirational/last_breath.html